fearing the flush

I'm not a big fan of public washrooms; just the thought of all the germs lurking in there is enough to make anyone squirm. However, my sweet little Lady M has developed a fear of these restrooms not because of the germs, but because of the flush. Its been an ongoing saga for a few months now, and one that doesn't seem to be getting any better quite yet. Let me backtrack a little.

A few months ago, Cal had to go into work one day a little unexpectedly. I was getting ready to go to a wedding shower, so to help me out he took Lady M with him to work, while I got ready and looked after Lady A. Cal was working at a new hotel that day, and while there, Lady M had to use the washroom. But, in the new-age world of germ-avoidance, and touch-free everything, these new washrooms were equipped with automatic flushing toilets. Though she really had to go, the sudden, unexpected flush while she was trying to go to the washroom startled the heck out of her, and she jumped off. She returned to the washroom three times (she really had to go!), only to be faced with the same flushing fate with each visit. And thus, the fear of the public washroom began.

A few weeks later, we were heading up to northern Ontario to visit some family for Thanksgiving. On the way we stopped at a rest station to grab a bite to eat, and use the washroom. Lady M quickly noticed the automatic flush, and said she wouldn't go. As she slowly backed away from the toilet in the family washroom, she found herself standing immediately underneath an automatic hand dryer. Not just your average dryer, nope, an Xcelerator one. The extremely loud noise, coupled with the shock of being blown by the strong air, scared my poor little girl so much that she refused to go to the washroom (again), and actually held it all the way up north (a 6-hour journey, when all was said and done). We went to Canadian Tire and bought a new potty seat for her, and with a little coaxing, she finally gave in to using the washroom at the house for the rest of our stay.

Later that week, we were heading to the airport to pick my mum and dad up after a trip they had been on. Once again, my little sweetie had to use the restroom in public, but by this point she was so fearful of the toilet that she got into the family restroom and SCREAMED. I was certain that by the time we got out of the washroom, authorities would be waiting to see who was stealing children at the airport, naturally concerned by the blood-curdling screams coming from beyond the door. This time took another three visits to the washroom before she finally went, and thankfully nobody was waiting to pull me into a scary interrogation room when we came out.

Then yesterday we were out at a store, rather close to our house, but she suddenly told me she REALLY had to go. So, into the public washroom we went, only to be met with the now usual cries and screams, though I assured her this one didn't have an automatic flush. Another woman came into the stall next door, so I explained to Lady M that the toilet beside her would flush, and not to be afraid. I then heard the nice woman kindly say "I can come back and flush in a few minutes if you'd like, she's breaking my heart"! Though very kind, I said not to worry, and Lady M dealt with the flush next door without much concern.

Having not gone to the washroom, we exited the stall and ended up chatting with the nice lady 'next door'. She told me that when her son was little he refused to go in public too, so they actually carried a full potty for him everywhere they went until he was four years old! If he had to go, they'd head out to the car, pull out the potty and deal with it. I must say, it was nice to hear that someone else had struggled with this too. She also told me that her son is now 26, and they still make fun of him for having to take that potty everywhere!

So, the saga continues, without any resolution as of yet. Hopefully one day soon my little Lady M will settle into using a public washroom. But for now, we'll just carry a little travel potty seat with us, and try to get her used to going in public when necessary! Hopefully before long, she'll stop fearing the flush.

bells on pop-tails ring...

Hard to believe the Christmas season has already come and gone. Even though with a three-year-old in the house, the celebration started earlier than ever (November), it still managed to flash by in a moment. Last year Lady M got quite in to Christmas, or so I thought. Because it was nothing like the excitement she felt this year as we counted down the days to the arrival of S. Claus. She talked about Christmas constantly, learned several carols verbatim, and told us every day of a new toy she hoped Santa would bring.

We had a friendly little 'elf on the shelf' visit our home this year, fondly named "Bubby" on the first morning he arrived. Lady M loved looking for him every morning when she awoke, and would pop by his daily location to chat with him here and there. On top of that, she received a special video message from Santa Claus' PNP, which she watched no fewer than ten times, quite proud that she was on Santa's 'nice list'. She also went to her first Santa Claus parade this year in our hometown, and got to see Lady A and I in the parade. Of course, she was most excited to see the big guy in his sleigh at the end of the parade!

This was the first year I couldn't really take Lady M Christmas shopping with me, as she's not the greatest at keeping a secret. For instance, we would pick something up for Cal and she would quickly say "Daddy, we got you a new coat!". So much for surprises! But, armed with this knowledge, I became well-acquainted with the glorious world of online shopping. Thanks to Toys R Us, Best Buy and Old Navy's respective online shopping systems, Christmas was easily completed, and delivered right to my door!

Lady A was blissfully oblivious to what was happening throughout the season, but she happily crawled around, climbed on her new presents, and tried to eat lots of colourful wrapping paper and bows. Just about right for a little one who is approaching the 8-month mark! Lady M gladly "helped" her sister open all of her presents, even going the extra mile, testing them all out for Lady A. If that's not sisterly love, I don't know what is!

But my favourite part of this Christmas, by far, was Lady M's love of Christmas carols. Between the ones we sang at home, the CD of kids carols we had in the car, and the songs she learned at preschool, her musical repertoire grew tenfold this year, and she has been singing non-stop for weeks.

Her favourite two songs were Rudolph and Jingle Bells, even if she thought the bells on 'pop-tails' were ringing! She then took her beautiful singing skills to the stage with all of her preschool friends when she took part in her first Christmas recital. A proud moment for any parent, naturally. She was adorable, decked out in her pretty party dress, belting out tunes alongside her adorable little classmates. What's not to love?

As the youngest in my family, I always heard people say that Christmas is better with kids. I didn't really understand it until I became a parent, and after spending four Christmases with Lady M, and one now with Lady A, I have no doubt that Christmas will be a little more fabulous and fun with each passing year.

So, the bells on pop-tails have stopped ringing for this year, but the memories will keep me happy for the next eleven months until we get set to do it all again.

Happy New Year!

uno, dos, flis, rauncho...

My little girl is a linguist. Of course its been said that the younger a child is when they learn a language, the more easily they will pick it up and retain it, accent and all. Well, with two grandmothers, a father and a mother who know French, Lady M has heard pieces of the French language her entire life.

From my time living in Sweden, I still recall some of the language, so I will throw the odd word or sentence at her, with my oh-so-realistic Scandinavian accent. Its a stretch, but who knows, she may find herself living in Scandinavia someday with an uncanny ability to order a ham and cheese sandwich, or take the #54 bus to the university.

I have also studied some Spanish, so will bestow my vast vocabulary on her from time to time, but I can't take all the credit for her love of the Spanish language. Rather, she has recently developed a mild obsession with Diego (the animated animal rescuer), and her mastery of this delightful romance language is budding before our very eyes.

In fact, just a couple of days ago, she started counting something...in Spanish, rather than English. It caught me off guard a little bit, and while I had a moment of pride, I had an even longer moment of laughter For my little Lady M counted as follows... uno, dos, flis, rauncho, cinco, seis, siete, ocho...

Pretty close! But, for anyone who knows how to count it out, 'flis' should be 'tres', and 'rauncho' should be 'cuatro'. Let's be honest though, 'flis' and 'rauncho' were WAY funnier.

So, if she learns all of her Spanish from her pal Diego, we may have to work on pronunciation a little, but I'd say she's off to a great start. A little linguist in the making...

so long, old friend

We knew the time was coming.

It had to arrive sooner or later.

We just weren't sure how it would all pan out.

Lady M and her beloved soother have officially parted ways.

So long, old friend!

Here's how it all happened: From a young age, Lady M has had a tight-knit relationship with her dear little soothers. She hadn't slept without one since she was about 6 months old, so I found myself considering various ways to get her out of the habit of having it, as I felt she was getting just a little bit old to rely on its comfort.

There are plenty of methods out there for helping kids say goodbye: passing the soothers along to a new sibling when they are born, leaving them for Santa's reindeer on Christmas Eve, or cutting it out cold turkey. No matter how you slice it, taking something precious away from your sweet little child is never easy. However, with her third birthday looming, I felt the time had come.

We decided not to take it away from her when Lady A was born; I had this terrible feeling that passing her soothers along to her sister would just breed some sort of resentment, and I just didn't want their sisterly relationship to begin in such a way. (I know, dramatic, right?!) I thought Christmas was a little too far away, and the thought of cutting it out cold turkey seemed a little harsh. (Secret's out, I'm a bit of a pushover!)

So, for a couple months leading up to her third birthday we began to prep her for the parting. "Three year olds don't need soothers" we told her, "you're going to be a big girl!" She would repeat the same thing back, surely not realizing that she was actually going to be rid of her sleepytime pal once and for all in a short time.

However, she had preschool the morning of her third birthday, and when I went to pick her up one of her teachers asked me, "is Lady M losing her soother today"? I answered "yes" (feeling a little sad for her before she had even tried sleeping without it), but I guess my little girl was prepared because she had told her teachers that she wouldn't have her soother anymore, because she was three.

We got home, had lunch, and it was time for her nap...the time had come. Deep breath. I put her to bed without her trusty companion with only a small fuss. (I was amazed). She fell asleep relatively easily, but woke up a short time later extremely grouchy and clearly still very tired. So, I decided we had made a big stride by her going to sleep without it, so I let her have it to finish her nap. (It was her birthday, after all!)

That night, same thing...only a mild fuss before she fell asleep without her soother. However, waking up about halfway through the night sobbing, we chose to give it to her for the remainder of the night. For the next day's nap and overnight sleep, we placed the soother beside her in bed after she was asleep so if she woke up at some point, she would find it, and comfort. I guess it worked, because she slept through without issue. (Yay Lady M!)

Then on day three....the breakthrough! No soother through her whole nap, and no soother all night! She asked for it before bed, often told us she 'didn't want to be a big girl', and for a couple of days, she would come crawl into our bed in the middle of the night, but that was ok. It was a pretty big transition after all. And just a few short days later, she was soother-free and sleeping through the night.

After all is said and done, Lady M may have some negative memories of her third birthday, but I suspect all the presents, balloons, cupcakes and the farm party will alleviate some of the pain we caused her when she reminisces about her third birthday in the future!

my healthy quest...and 30 things update

My little Lady A hit the 6-month milestone two weeks ago. Hard to believe that six months have flown by in the blink of an eye, and that she's half way through her first year of life. It means we have a little more time between feedings and fewer naps, ergo, more awake time! With this somewhat 'found' time, I have a chance to focus a little more on me for the first time in a while.

With that said, I'm on a quest to get back to being healthy and fit...a place I haven't been in a few years, since having my munchkins. In between having Lady M & Lady A it was easy to set getting fit aside, knowing that I was planning to become pregnant again. But this time, my family is complete, so no easy excuses!!

My sister-in-law has recently graduated as a nutritionist, so with such great knowledge at my fingertips, I would be silly not to work with her, so I am! Thanks to her encouragement and ideas, I'm trying new recipes, making small changes to the items stocked in my kitchen, and drinking more water than I ever have before! The thing that's even better, is that these little lifestyle changes positively affect my entire family.

On the workout front, I continue on with my Zumba classes as often as possible. (To read about the moment I fell in love with this 'exercise in disguise', check out this old post). In fact, in just a few days I'm off to Instructor Training so I can not only attend these fantastic classes, I can teach them too!

I've also found a great Stroller Fitness class that I've been attending for a few weeks with Lady A; I'm working muscles I haven't worked in ages, and its awesome. I'm currently competing in a 'Biggest Loser' challenge with them, trying to win a big gift certificate so I can take even more classes over the winter and continue to challenge myself in new ways. And the best part? I can take my girls with me!

So between the nutrition, fitness classes and a little challenge on the side, I think they're all great steps. And its working to achieve one of the goals that I set out for myself earlier this year in my 30 things post.

Which brings me to a little update on that front. Its been 3 months since I first outlined my goals, so in an effort to stay on track, thought I'd provide a little update as to where things stand...

1. Become a creative entrepreneur as an exciting side project
• Haven't made it too far on this one, but I will get there! 
2. Complete Zumba Fitness instructor training
• All set to go this Saturday, and I couldn't be more excited!! 
3. Donate blood (hopefully on a regular occasion, but let's go for once to start)
• Hmm, I'll take this one as a reminder...I need to go do this. One of my friends said she'd like to join me, so I think we should make a date! 
4. Have an impeccably organized home
• Slowly, but surely...this is an ongoing process
5. Learn Adobe Illustrator
• This one is in the works! I think I may take a class in the New Year if I can find some time.
6. Reach my post-pregnancy goal weight
• As mentioned, the nutrition plans, and fitness goals are all leading toward this one... 
7. Read a minimum of four books for pleasure this year (yes, that's a lofty goal with two munchkins in the house and lots of school reading at any given time!!)
• I have finished one so far, and am working on book number two. The first was Mini Shopaholic (yup, that's right, total chick lit!), and now I'm reading Smart Couples Finish Rich. Might as well work on my financial future while I'm at it, right?! 
8. Share more stories on my blog so my girls will have a great memoir of their childhood
• Trying to write more whenever I can. I think I need to figure out some form of measurement on this one though...I guess as long as I'm writing more than I did last year overall, then I'm achieving this goal. 
9. Start teaching a regular Zumba class
• I can do this once I'm a full-fledged instructor! 

So there we have it...that's where I am with my annual goals; definitely some things to work on, but I'm making a few of the goals a reality already, so I feel like I'm on the right track. Feel free to hold me accountable to anything you read here!! 

opinions

I'm a very opinionated person. When I know what I want, I'm not one to change my mind, and I almost always go with my gut instinct when it comes to decision making. I've been like for as long as I can remember. I don't hang around in a store for long, trying to decide whether I want to buy something or not. I simply make the decision or leave. I only tried on about 5 or 6 wedding dresses because I knew what I wanted as soon as it was on. And when it comes to parenting, I'm no different.

While I appreciate that everyone has different parenting styles, I don't really care to know about them in great depth. I enjoy talking with my mum, sister-in-law, and girlfriends who are parents, but beyond that, I'm not interested in what everyone else has to say. That may sound harsh, but there are just so many opinions out there, that you have to draw the line somewhere! Cal and I just parent the way our instincts tell us to, and I'm proud of that.

When I was pregnant with Lady M, about to be a first-time mum, every other mother out there had an opinion and wanted to tell me how to parent, how to birth, how to do everything. Horror stories about deliveries abounded, and were certainly never asked for! People wanted to tell you what to buy and what not to buy, how to deal with sleep, eating, nursing, and anything else they could think of. And more than anything, people seemed to find it very important to tell you "oh, you're going to be so tired!".

Yes, though I hadn't had a child yet, I assumed being tired was part of the game. I think the piece of 'advice' that bothered me most was when people would say "get your sleep now!". Well, how the hell is that going to help me three weeks from now, after I deliver a child and have to start raising it?! So, since becoming a parent, and understanding the sleepless nights in a different way, I have made it a priority never to suggest that a parent-to-be 'get their sleep now'.

However, the one thing I found many parents telling me in my pre-child days was 'they'll grow up so fast'. Well, that just may be the one thing I have repeated.

In less than a week, Lady A will be 6 months old, and Lady M will be celebrating her 3rd birthday, and I really keep questioning 'where has the time gone?'. Three years have zipped by in the blink of an eye, and my little Lady M has gone from infant to toddler, and is somehow now a little girl, who has interesting conversations with me on a daily basis. She has strong opinions (not sure where she gets that!), and a never-ending interest in everything around her.

My little Lady A has gone from helpless infant, to a sweet little baby who reacts to everything, smiles every time she hears her big sister's name, has found her voice, and is on the verge of crawling. So, in fact, they do grow up so fast.

I promise I'll never hear myself telling a parent-to-be to get their sleep, or offering unsolicited details about child delivery that people simply don't need to know. I promise not to be one of those more experienced parents who try to tell the newbie horror stories to scare them before their wee one arrives, or how they should sleep train, feed or nurse their child. However, you may just hear me saying that it all goes by in a flash, because three years have never passed so quickly in my life, until now.

i went to iceland and took my rollerskates

I've decided to start fueling Lady M's interest in traveling at an early age. I've been lucky to travel a fair bit, and I hope that one day my kids will want to travel to fabulous, far off places too. In fact, the list of countries I still want to visit is enormous, and I look forward to the day when we can travel as a family and explore the world together.

Until then, we'll learn about new places right here at home. We're always pulling a new book off her bookshelf and over the last couple of weeks we've been enjoying looking at a children's atlas that was given to me at one of my baby showers. The book is awesome; great, colourful pictures and simple descriptions of people, places and things, just whetting her appetite for learning about the world.

The first time we looked at it, I pointed out a few key countries for her reference -

• Canada, where we live, of course; 
• Sweden, where I have lived; 
• England where my Dad was born; 
• India, where my grandparents were born;  
• Australia where Cal has traveled and 
• Costa Rica & Nicaragua where Cal and I honeymooned, just so we could really hop all across the map. 

She likes to tell me that she's been to each of these places with Cal and I which I think is great. I'd love to know what sort of travel memories her busy little imagination has conjured up!

Then, for a little spin around North America, we also look at Victoria and Daytona Beach, places Lady M has visited. Of course her concept of how vast the world is is quite limited, but we have fun talking about each place and I enjoy listening to her (often imagined) recollection of her adventures.

Right now she likes to point to each of the key places listed, and then finds new, colourful countries to point at. The other day when we were looking at the atlas, she put her finger on a country and said "I've been there!". I said, "that's Iceland", to which she replied, "yeah, Iceland - I took my rollerskates there and went all over".

Why shouldn't she want to rollerskate across Iceland, or think she already has? I love the imagination children have and hope many of these things really happen for her down the road.

In fact, I hope one day we can roller skate in Iceland together.